The Simon Le Bon Diaries: Part 2


Geronimo has uncovered EXCLUSIVELY for Cherry Lipstick some further extracts from the personal records of Simon Le Bon ('borrowed' from a biscuit tin in the potting shed at the bottom of Si's garden).

Sunday 7 March 1982

At home for Sunday roast with Mum and Dad in Pinner. So good to be back. No one being bitchy today – finally! AT is such a pain at times. No – ALL THE TIME!!! And it’s not just him that’s annoying – I can’t get near the control desk (even if I knew what it did) for NR hovering over it. And then there’s ‘John The God’ in his stupid trilby chipping in with “Yeah, in 1978 when I started the band…” I know his game! At least Roge is a good laugh. Oh God – tomorrow’s Monday and I’ve got to go back…

Monday 8 March

Had a great idea today while putting the finishing touches to The Driver! I was flicking through my old note books from Israel and saw a scribble from my ‘talking to the dolphins’ hippy period that said ‘sing blue water’. So – rather inspired I thought – I added ‘silver’ as that’s the colour of my new ear ring. NR loved it! John hung about trying to find something to criticise so I said, “Yeah, that’s from when I was travelling in ’78.” Ha!

Tuesday 9 March

Should’ve seen that coming – John gets his own back. I’m working on the middle bit in Hungry Like The Wolf when John starts rushing me and says, “just go ‘do do do’.” But that’s what I’m doing in Rio and Lonely In Your Nightmare! Andy turns up and says “I could ‘do do do’ with a you-know-what!” John starts giggling at this. He says he hasn’t changed at all, but I don’t feel the same. He just can’t laugh all the time.

Saturday March 20 1982

Finally off on the plane to Sri Lanka! Mum made me pack some pills in case I get a dicky tum. JT / AT had one of their weird conversations in the row next to me. “So we’ll need some 'special toothpaste' when we get there,” says Andy, all smiley. John says, “Oh yes! We’ll need to 'clean our teeth' when we land – I’ve put it in my wash bag.” Andy looks very alarmed. “You fuckin’ what? You idiot!” he hisses. They then huddle together and John looks sweaty, grey and ashen. Andy is not much better. Maybe they’ll need some of Mum’s pills before we get there.

Wednesday 24 March.

NR finally arrives from the UK, looking all pleased with himself. He says that the album’s finished – I bet he’s left all the ‘do do dos’ in, like he did with the ‘ba ba bas’ in Planet Earth. I’ve been up to my neck in some disease-ridden water while JT / AT keep wandering off and giggling. This is getting ridiculous. Roger understands.

Thursday 25 March

Interesting call today. Guy knows a guy who knows a guy who owns this sailing boat called Eilean in Antigua. He needs someone to run the company, take rich tourists out fishing and sailing etc. Well, I was good on the Norfolk Broads, it’ll be hot and I’LL BE IN CHARGE! I mean, is this my life? Endlessly being pushed about and made to sing do-do-do. Is this band going to last much longer? I was so fed up I threw a café table around and didn’t care who saw it.

Friday 26 March

Made some calls about the boat…. Oooh, this might work, better keep it quiet from the boys.

(pages missing)

April 16

Just woke up – first Aussie show last night. I’d packed my military jacket but everyone else was in those new suits so I had to go and change. ANNOYING!

April 23

Packing again, off to Japan, charging about, always being told what to do. That boat is looking good…

April 24

Whoops. Sat on the plane to Japan daydreaming of Antigua. I overhear Berrow 1 chatting to Nick and John. They’re all happy about the Sri Lanka videos (well they didn’t have to do much, did they?) and they’re planning some new trip. Always ignoring me!!! “That English Harbor in Antigua is nice,” I butt in. They all turn and look at me funny. “How do you know that?” they ask. “Errr, I saw it on TV,” I add in what even I knew was a pretty unconvincing bluff. Later I over-heard NR talking. “I checked it out – that English Harbor area is gorgeous. We should go there.” Grrrr.

May 3

Arrive in Antigua – YES YES YES!!! Bring it on!

May 5

Awful day. Slip away and find Eilean’s owner. See boat. Sit on boat. All looking good. Then shown mop room. “Here is your cleaning equipment,” says horrible man. “Be here 5am tomorrow.” What? Then John and Andy show up. “Oh fuckin’ yes!” says John. “Is this the one, Mike?” says Andy to Berrow 2. “Yes indeedy!” says Berrow 2. “Fuckin’ yes!” says John, sniffing repeatedly (how has he got a cold here?).

May 6.

A good day. Roger goes out to bat for me with Nick and Berrow 1 and I get to sit at the front on the boat. I’m in full frame and Andy gets pushed in the water. Rio is out soon. Maybe this band is worth sticking with for a bit longer after all…

Of course, years later Simon would remember this period differently as he recounted the story in 2012 to the a journalist...

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